Women, life, happiness
  • “Truth or Dare?” a guest-blog post by Jonna Spilbor

    September 29th, 2011Keryl PesceFamily and Relationships, Life in general

    This post comes courtesy of my Happy Hour radio show co-host Jonna Spilbor. Jonna is an attorney by day and as she likes to say "Superhero by night." Jonna is also a regular on Fox News and MSNBC and all around cool-chick and yes, a Happy Bitch. Enjoy her take on honesty always being the best policy, particularly when it comes to breakups. We talked about this topic during our September 29 radio show, Happy Hour, on Mix 97.7FM. Enjoy! You will love her style!

    Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?  


    Let's chat about honesty.  Honesty is like that over-sized piece of flourless chocolate cake at the end of a five course meal.  You think you really want it because it sounds good, but as you’re choking down the last of that five-pound puck o’ fudge, suddenly it occurs to you that you didn’t really save room for it after all.  And now, you feel pukey.     


    So here’s the question:  Is it really necessary to be completely honest all of the time? 


    Nope.  There, I said it.  Don’t shoot. 


    I get that some of you may be sitting there right now basking in the boldness of anonymity, courtesy of some pithy moniker, like “TaxiMom90210”, or “BieberBabe2U” or my personal favorite, "QT_3POINT_14", ready to blog me a new one.  You’re thinking, “Is this bitch really trying to tell me lying is okay?  Just like a lawyer!"


    Hear me out.  There are times in life when honesty is not the best policy.


    Do you really want someone else telling you that your new haircut sucks, or your boyfriend isn't that funny, or that the turkey casserole you bring to every potluck office party looks a lot like prison food?    


    Of course not.  And what good would it do, anyway?  Your hair will grow back eventually and, hey, if you actually like the way you look in an asymmetrical bob that’s all bent on the left side, who is anyone else to judge? 


    If honesty is so good for us, why is it so often do-see-do-ing with its ugly cousin, “brutal”?  Have you ever known anyone to be brutally pretty, brutally kind, or brutally rich?


    My point is this: Too much honesty can be a bad thing, at least when all that "honesty" is being catapulted out of other people’s throats in your direction.  This can be especially true when it comes to break ups.


    I’m going to tell you something that we should have learned way back in the sixth grade when little “Johnny Cool Sneakers” gave someone other than you a pink candy heart that said, “True Love”.   Ready?  When you find yourself on the receiving end of a post-it note from a new (or old) flame professing in five words or less that he's calling the relationship quits, you never, ever, never, ever, never need to know the real reason why. 


    You see, there is one and only one reason why a lover decides to leave, and that is . . .


    he's just not that into you.  Seriously. 


    Unfortunately men, when pressed on the issue, will never admit that they are not attracted to the fabulousness that makes you, you.  In fact, many men believe the reason they are leaving is due to something you did (i.e., you hate his mother), or didn't do (you failed to pay proper homage to his penis, to which he refers as his "meat hog" when he's being especially romantic).


    So ladies, please, save the exit interview for something that actually matters – like why you lost that slammin’ sales job at Abercrombie and hence, your thirty percent discount on all things denim. 


    Women never need to autopsy a dead relationship. Just bury it in a super sexy box, and be done.


    Real honesty – the good kind of honesty – actually, the only kind, comes from your inner voice.  The voice of your own self-confidence, your own inner warrior, or your own inner nag, whatever the case may be.  If it’s real to you, it’s real to you. There is no need to ever put someone else’s reality in your fabulous handbag and walk out of the store with it.  Leave it on the conveyor belt, girls. You don’t own it.   


    That's my take.  What's yours?

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