Women, life, happiness
  • “I’m tired of worrying all the time.”

    June 2nd, 2010Keryl PesceLife in general, Stress and Guilt

    Fine. Then don't.

    The way I see it is worry is Enemy Numero Uno. She's a bitch on a tear who stirs up unnecessary crap and leaves a trail of anxiety and misery in her wake. She'll steal your money (or keep you from making it), break up your marriage, make you look bad at work, cause you to look and feel older than you are and even make you physically sick. Given the opportunity, she'll completely annihilate your happiness.

    So don't let her.

    How? Quit hanging out with her. She ain't your friend and if you're not careful, she'll invade your life completely. She'll follow you everywhere – in the car as you're driving, in bed as you try to go to sleep (or enjoy sex), and even as you put your makeup on in the morning or wash the dishes at night. Get the good-for-nothing biatch out of your life. She's just no good.

    "Yeah, but I didn't invite her."

    Um, yeah, you did. Think about where and when she shows up. In your imagination. 

    What do we worry about? Usually whether or not something will happen, right? Typically worst-case scenarios and often stuff that never happens. Will I lose my job? Will I have enough money to pay this month's bills? Will my son be safe driving? Will my daughter get pregnant? Will my husband cheat on me? How will the test results come back? What if I screw this up? What if I never find Mr. Right?

    We create imaginary "what if" scenarios in our mind that cause unnecessary stress and worry. 

    Last week, my husband was driving four hours home at night from a business trip. The last text I received from him was how awful he slept the night before and how tired he was. Even before he was due home, I could literally feel a knot in my stomach worrying about his safety and what might happen. My worry bitch kept knocking at the door – and stupid me was letting her in. I realized I was creating my own anxiety and simply decided to stop. The worry was all in my head.

    Are there real situations to deal with and decisions to make? Every day. So deal with what is real. Deal with the facts. Use the best judgment you can in that moment, make a decision and let go of it.

    Do you really think you make the best choices when they are based off of worry and negative "what if" scenarios? Hardly. So ditch the worry. You will make better, smarter and more productive decisions.

    I realize this may come as a radical new concept to you, but the fact is worry is a choice we make. It is a chosen response to outside stimulus or more commonly, imagined events or situations. There's what happens and there's how we choose to respond or react. You are in complete control of the response.

    Take this one step further and use the power of your imagination for your benefit rather than detriment. As children, we used our imagination to dream of castles and princes and magical places. And what did it do? It made us happy. We had fun. We were care free. We hadn't yet learned to worry.

    What kinds of images are you creating in your head today? Don't stop at just eliminating worry. Start igniting your imagination again and use it to make you happier, to create a better life.

    Here's how.

    Tonight as you climb into bed and get comfortable, I want you to begin creating your own castle in the clouds. What would your dream life look like? Where are you? Who is with you? Are you inside or outside? Are you curled up on a plush couch, all alone with perfect quiet and a good book? Or are you lounging on a beach with a hot, bare-chested waiter handing you a Margarita? Whatever works.

    Let this be your new way of falling asleep. Each night, pull in another detail – fresh flowers on the table next to you, a perfect breeze, even a flat stomach. It's your world and you get to create whatever you can imagine.

    And here's the really cool part. Actually, two cool parts. One, mark my words, you will begin to see little signs of your imagined world manifesting in reality. No lie. Be on the lookout.

    Secondly, you are constructing the perfect place to which you can escape any time of the day you choose. If you feel stressed at work or with the kids, take even just 60 seconds and imagine you are in your perfect world. It's a complete kick in the ass to anxiety. You will feel instant relief. Our imagination can be a pretty spectacular place to hang out – as long as we re-learn how to use it.

    Send worry packing. Hang a sign on the door to your world "Worry is not welcome here." She'll get the message.

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4 responses to ““I’m tired of worrying all the time.”” RSS icon

  • I read a lot of rubbish when I am browsing, nice to find a blogger that puts some effort in.

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    Great site. A lot of useful information here. I’m sending it to some friends!

  • I didn’t only hang a sign on my door, but I rented out a billboard on every interstate in America! It reads — WORRIES NOT WELCOMED, ONLY POSITIVE CAN APPLY WITHIN!!.

  • Great advice… I’d love to slaughter that biatch out of my life, that’s for sure!!! You do make it sound so easy and it does make alot of sense….Whew!!!

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