Ask Happy Bitch…

Women, life, happiness
  • What is this thing we call happiness anyway?

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    April 29th, 2010Keryl PesceLife in general

    If there is one universal desire every human being has, regardless of how young or old, rich or poor, large or small, gay or straight, married or single, it is to be happy. We all want it. What I wonder is this: does the difficulty some of us have in achieving happiness lie in our lack of understanding or clear definition of what it actually is? 

    If we don't know what we are searching for, how are we going to find it? Let's give this a little thought.

    How do you define happiness?

    Webster's Dictionary defines happiness as "A state of well-being or contentment." Makes sense, but it doesn't tell me much. Another definition I've read by Dr. John A. Schindler is "A state of mind in which our thinking is pleasant a good share of the time." I like that one a little better.

    What about you? I'm curious what happiness means to you.

    When have you felt your happiest? Was it a lunch or dinner with your best gal pals acting silly and giggling like a love-struck teen? Or maybe looking in your baby's eyes for the first time. Maybe it was just sitting lazily in bed on a bright spring morning, with your favorite magazine and a perfect cup of coffee. Aaaah, virtual paradise in my book.

    What picture comes to your mind and what feeling do you experience when you think of happiness? Are you continue »

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  • “My teenage daughter won’t listen to me.”

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    April 22nd, 2010Keryl PesceFamily and Relationships, Life in general

     

    " Lately, I look in the eyes of my daughter, and it feels as if I'm living with a stranger. I don't know who she is anymore. All I'm trying to do is keep her on a good path – get her to do her homework, do a few chores around the house and stay away from kids who are a bad influence. I'm her mother. That's what I'm supposed to do. But she doesn't see it that way. She fights me tooth and nail on everything. I punish her, and her behavior gets even worse. It's as if it has become her life's mission to make my life miserable. And she's doing a damn good job of it. I didn't raise her to be this lazy and disrespectful. I'm at my wits' end."

    This woman, Kathy, is a normal mother and just wants what's best for her daughter. What mother doesn't? This challenge certainly isn't unique to Kathy. Millions of parents believe in their heart of hearts that they know what's best for their children and will stop at nothing  to keep them on the right path. After all, it's for their own good.

    Or is it? continue »

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  • “Why can’t I lose weight? I would be so happy.”

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    April 14th, 2010Keryl PesceFamily and Relationships, Healthy Living
    Well if that ain't the question on the minds of about 98% of adult women, I don't know what is. This is going to be interesting. What I’m about to tell you isn’t what you’re used to hearing.
     
    Let's start with the question "Why can't I lose weight?".  Part of the problem lies within the question itself. You see the language we use is a reflection of the way we think. The question reflects ineffective thinking.
     
    How so? By asking this, you are looking for reasons you've been unable to succeed. Trust me. You will get them. Without realizing it, you’re continue »
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  • I’m gay and afraid what people will think. What should I do?

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    April 8th, 2010Keryl PesceLife in general

    I’ve actually known this girl for years. I’ve always felt a sense of sadness within her. She seldom smiles, let alone laughs. Most times my attempts to pick up her mood have been futile. I never took it personally, but I always wondered why she was so closed off and sad.

    Now I understand.

     

    Who wouldn’t feel sad and lonely? Imagine living a life on the outside that isn’t in alignment with who you are on the inside. What if her friends or family look down on her? What if they disapprove or even cut her out of their lives? Think about what it must be like to censor every thought, every word and every feeling. Maybe you already do. My heart breaks for her or anyone else in this position.

     

    First question I have is continue »

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  • “My kids are all grown up and I don’t know who I am anymore.”

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    April 1st, 2010Keryl PesceFamily and Relationships

    “I can feel myself close to slipping into depression. I got so much joy from being a mom, but my kids just don’t need me as much anymore. I know I’ve got to let go, but it’s so hard. I feel like I’m letting go of a part of my life. It’s as if my life as I knew it is over, and that’s really scary for me. I know can’t hold them back, nor do I want to. I can’t stop them from growing up and moving on with their lives, but I don’t know how I’ll ever be happy again. I feel so lost. ”

    Can you feel for her? I sure do. Right now, she sees no alternative to letting go of her life as she knew it.   This is one of many situations in life where we women end up the rope in a classic tug of war and pulling on either end, in completely opposite directions, are logic and emotion. Our left brain sees pretty clearly what we need to do. continue »

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